Patience is a Virtue...passed on to your children!

As some of you know, patience is something I have struggled with, especially in the area of child raising. I didn't see having four children as all that much harder than three, but I'm entering a stage now where my infant daughter is becoming more demanding. I often find myself with four children demanding my attention at once, with so much going on that I end up snapping at one or more of the children, before I even hear what they are saying. This can produce many problems, including one child feeling like I don't want to hear what he has to say, or another child feeling like he has no way to express himself. That is why I have really been working on this lately.

I've found that being on my new diet has helped. I am rarely depressed anymore, and have a lot more energy and patience. I also have recently realized that the discipline problems I've been having with my two year old have most likely stemmed from a frustration of not being understood. He sees his older siblings talking and being listened to, whereas he is still learning new words, and didn't know how to properly assert himself and be heard. Instead of stating what he wanted, or telling someone how he felt, he would just scream. Or should I say, shriek! He was throwing himself on the floor often throughout the day, and having fits. Believe me, I know the fault is mine. Somehow along the way, he got a little bit spoiled, and adding that to his excitable temperament...well, let's just say it's a bad combination.

My solution? First, I spent a day or two being extremely patient with him, and instead of punishing him on the first offense, I would explain to him that he needed to use his words like a big boy, and tell me what he wanted, or tell his siblings when he wanted them to stop doing something. I might give him one more chance after that, then he would be disciplined. When I saw him use his words instead of screaming, I lavished him with praise and affection. After a few days, he was really getting the hang of it. I also noticed that he went through a maturing process around the same time (I say halleluia when this time comes in every child's life!) and he has not only started talking more and behaving more "grown up", but is also obeying better, wanting to help out more, and learning to be nicer to his siblings. He is even learning to share and make sacrifices for them now, like his older brother does.

Ah, the blessings of a (slightly) quieter house!