Home from the Hospital

Thank you all for your prayers. The surgery went well. There was only one hernia to repair. I was pretty sick feeling and in a lot of pain the first day, but then they worked out the medication and I continued to get better after that. I was in the hospital four days. I pumped the whole time for my daughter, and she latched on right away when I came home. I was relieved, because I worried she wouldn't want to nurse after having bottles.

I'm still extremely sore, but the doctor gave me plenty of pain medication (unlike my last o.b., who didn't seem to care that I was in pain the whole time, grrr). My wonderful husband will be home for a week to do everything for me. He even tidied up and organized some stuff for me while I was gone. :-)

I was very nervous before going in for the operation, because I was getting general anesthesia, and I was in the hospital alone (my husband had to drop me off and stay home with our four children). But it ended up being no big deal, and I was glad they put me under, since it meant not having to experience any discomfort or fear during surgery.

Well, I'm pretty sore right now, I'll post more tomorrow when I feel better. God bless.

Surgery on Friday

I mentioned in an earlier post, I will be going in for surgery on Friday. It is for a hernia, which I developed following my fourth c-section three months ago. It's gotten worse, and can be extremely painful sometimes. I will be going under general anesthesia. I'm not too thrilled, since I'm overweight, have sleep apnea and some other medical issues which raise my risks of being put under.

As you know, I have four small children depending on me, ages 3 months to four years old. They and their daddy need me, so PLEASE remember me often in your prayers, that the surgery may be successful and uneventful, and that the pain and recovery time will be minimal. My husband doesn't have much vacation time left, so I won't be healed when he goes back to work, and I will have no help then. Now is one of those times I could really use an older child! The four year old is pretty much only good for fetching things. I could use a baby-holder and a diaper-changer and a dinner-maker, lol.

I'm starting to get pretty nervous. General anesthesia is a big deal. I could go to sleep and wake up before the judgement seat of God. I'm a little worried when I think about that, because I'm not happy with the kind of Christian that I have been lately. I have been extremely lax, particularly in my prayer and worship. And although I think I have been much more patient with my children and somewhat more diligent with my household duties, I feel that I am still falling far short of what I could and should be doing as a mother and wife. So hopefully when they put me to sleep on Friday, I will wake up...for REAL!

Thank you in advance for your prayers.

Mommaroo2

Oh, and by the way, I'll let you know next week, when I'm feeling better, who the challenge winner was. And I'm sorry to say I won't finish the challenge myself, due to the unexpected surgery, but I'll get done what I can. At least I have one cupboard done, and that's more than what I had done before, lol!

New Arrival!

Journey to Homemaker

As you may have guessed, in my absence from the blog, I have had my baby. She was nine pounds and 20 1/2 inches long. I had her by cesarean section a week earlier than expected, because of potential complications. As it turns out, there were no complications, and she was very healthy. I came through surgery okay, but it was a very bad experience. They did not give me enough anesthesia during the surgery, and definitely did not give me enough pain killers after the surgery. I was pretty miserable. Then I got an infection, in spite of the large amount of antibiotics I was on. It just went downhill from there. I'll spare you the details! Let's just say that this was definitely the worst of the four c-sections I've had. But at least I got a beautiful healthy baby girl out of it. :-)

She's a good baby, and sleeps very well. Unfortunately the last few mornings, she keeps stirring and getting fussy like she wants to eat, but by the time I try to get her to latch on, she's sound asleep again, and won't be awakened to eat. Then fifteen minutes later, she does it again. Luckily she sleeps in bed with me, or I'd get no sleep.

My husband went back to work today. I've been spoiled the last two weeks--he's done everything! And of course, the older three have conspired together to drive me up the wall today!! I think they've got a plan...be bad enough for mommy, and daddy might stay home! Actually the oldest isn't too bad, but the younger two are giving me a run for my money. But right now they're all in bed for a nap (yaayy) and I'm planning on taking one with the baby myself.

The nice thing about my husband staying home for two weeks is that he's realized how much work it is to care for so many little ones all by yourself. He does appreciate what I do, but I don't think he understood why I got so little done during the day. I have a hard time just keeping the house looking decent, never mind all the laundry, cleaning, etc. I'm working on it though. I just need to be more organized. But in the meantime, he found out firsthand that it's a lot tougher than he thought. There's a big difference between caring for them on the weekends, with my help, and doing it all alone for two weeks. I'm hoping to get a lot done today so that he'll be impressed when he comes home. But I'm already pretty tired, so we'll just have to see how it goes!!

Disappointing news

Journey to Homemaker

It looks like there will be no VBAC for me. I've exhausted nearly all my sources. It's been such an emotional roller coaster for me, getting my hopes up, then losing hope, that I just can't take the stress anymore. So I am scheduling a c-section for the first week in March. I did find a holistically-inclined hospital in the area, and luckily my insurance covers it. It's small and almost brand new. They have a waterbirthing room, doula services, and use alternative labor methods like aroma therapy, lavender bath salts, etc. There's even a masseuse on staff! I won't be using the other stuff since I'll be having a c-section, but maybe I'll take advantage of the masseuse. :-)

The best thing is that they don't take the baby away from you. If the baby is healthy, she and the dad stay with you for the rest of surgery, then they wheel you out with the baby in your arms, and you recover in your postpartum room with your family at your side. Soooo different from most hospitals. They allow you to put off the bathing, weighing, etc. to establish a bond and start breastfeeding. It sounds so great, I'm almost looking forward to it, even though it is a hospital birth, and a surgery.

I usually have such easy pregnancies, but it seems like the more kids I have, the harder the last month is. I'm not feeling too great. If I have a very stressful day, I start feeling sick and have a ton of Braxton Hicks contractions. I'm looking forward to the baby coming, especially to the two weeks of rest I will get afterwards! I always sleep so well when I'm breastfeeding a newborn (gotta love those breastfeeding hormones) and my husband will be home to take care of me for a while.

Unfortunately my doula seems to be backing out on me. I can't even get ahold of her on the phone. Since we have no family or friends in the area, we have no one we can trust to watch our children. So I may have to go through the surgery alone. Since the hospital has volunteer doulas, I'm going to try to get one of those. It will be disappointing to not have anyone who cares about me with me. But as long as I can keep the baby with me, I'll be happy enough.

Whew!

Journey to Homemaker

Last night I had such a stressful time with the kids, that by the time I sat down to relax, I was having contractions like crazy. They felt like Braxton Hicks, which is no big deal. But then I started feeling sick and my back started hurting...uh oh! I started thinking about everything not done, the baby clothes, the hospital bag, etc.

So I decided to try to pack a bag quickly, just in case. As it turns out, I'm worse off than I thought. I had done two loads of baby stuff, but when I looked through it, it was all either summer stuff, 3-6 month stuff, blankets, etc. Nothing useful! Grrrr! So I started dragging out all the baby clothes boxes, searching for baby girl winter clothes. Unfortunately, my daughter was born in a warmer climate in late spring, so it was all either boy stuff, or girl summer stuff!! Now I realize I don't even have the right baby clothes to wash!!!

I found a couple of not-so-cute sleepers, sweaters, etc. and threw them in the wash. Then I printed off my birth plan, which was still in progress, tried in vain to locate my medical records (since I'm switching o.b.'s) . By the time I put the clothes in the dryer and made a list of stuff to take to the hospital, I was too tired to pack. At that point I figured it probably wasn't real labor, just pre-labor. I do think that the baby descended a little bit. So it gave me a big kick in the pants to get ready!

Unfortunately, I can't find our infant car seat. I'm suspecting I may have sold it before we moved the last time, thinking I wanted a new one anyway. We did that with a lot of stuff, and wouldn't you know it, we don't have the money to replace it!! We should at least be able to get the baby home if we don't have the other kids with us, because one of our car seats is a convertible car seat that can be adjusted to face to the rear for an infant. We just can't take the whole family anywhere.

So now I have to find an infant car seat AND buy new baby clothes. Which is so annoying, since I already had a girl! I thought I was all set. That'll teach me not to plan ahead. :-) But at least God is giving me a kick in the pants...I had another bad day today, and got nauseous and crampy again...a good reminder to not slack off, just in case!

Preparing for a New Baby

Journey to Homemaker

I can't believe there's only four weeks til my due date! Nothing is done, aaarrrrggh!! I've been so busy trying to find a midwife, that everything else has fallen by the wayside. I don't know if I'm going to have a homebirth, because the midwives are all nervous about taking me. Not only have I had three c-sections, but I have gestational diabetes and my babies are big. Let this be a lesson to those who haven't had c-sections--do NOT let them push you into one, unless it is truly necessary for your health or the baby's. Doctors nowadays are too impatient and worried about lawsuits to "allow" you to have a baby the way God intended. It is estimated that half of all US cesareans are unneccesary. And if you've had one, learn how to avoid getting stuck with one in the future.

Fortunately, I found a local hospital that is actually holistically inclined, believe it or not. They promote waterbirth, use of aromatherapy, and rooming in. There actually isn't even a regular nursery, just a special-care nursery. They're very open-minded. There's no recovery room for c-section patients either. After the baby is delivered, if the baby is doing fine, she stays with the dad, in the OR while surgery is finished, then put into your arms as they wheel you out, and you "recover" in your regular postpartum room. It sounds SOOOO much nicer than normal hospital procedure. At least if I have to have a c-section this time, it won't be as traumatic. But I sure could use some prayers that I don't have to have a cesarean. Pray I can have a vaginal birth...or better yet, that the baby comes so quickly at home that I won't have a chance to go in for a c/s. Not likely with my big babies, but "I can do all things in Him, Who strengtheneth me."

I did buy a couple of cool baby things yesterday. One is a "Nursing Nest" it's a firm foam rubber little bed with a terry cloth cover on it. It's shaped to hold a baby laying on its side, for nursing. It was created by a mom after her c-section. You can use it for co-sleeping, table-top nursing, etc. It was forty dollars, but I got it on clearance at Babies r Us for thirty.

The other thing was the Ultimate Baby Wrap. It's a wrap-style carrier. It seems very comfortable and versatile. I haven't tried it with a baby yet, but I plan to try it with my youngest, who is around thirty pounds. It's supposed to support up to 35. It was forty dollars. I've heard people online say it's too hard to learn to use. I didn't think so at all. I think it will probably take a little practice to master getting it on quickly, but it comes with a DVD so it was pretty easy to figure out.

I always "wear" my babies outside the house, when running errands. But at home all the carriers seemed inconvenient, especially for breastfeeding. The only carrier I had found to nurse in easily was the NoJo sling (a padded sling similar to the Over the Shoulder Baby Holder). I found it to be too hot, and the babies didn't like nursing in it, probably because it felt too claustrophobic. The Ultimate Baby Wrap isn't padded, but it's very comfy. It is wide, so it can be spread out over your shoulders to minimize the pressure. It supports the baby well, and is easily adjustable for different positions. The only thing I don't think I'll like is that the DVD says you need help to get the baby into the back carry position. Although I thought I'd read online there's a way to get a baby in the back carry position alone. We'll see how comfortable it is.

Now I just need to wash all the rest of the baby clothes, clean the whole house, hand wash all the baby items like the breast pumps, and find a car seat. Yikes!

Pre-eclampsia / optimal fetal positioning

Journey to Homemaker

I apologize to those who are not pregnant right now for all the baby-related stuff, but that's just where I'm at right now. I'll give birth and go back to more normal mom stuff, lol!

I wanted to write about pre-eclampsia because a lot of women don't realize how serious it is. There is a lot of info on preeclampsia.org about it, but you have to take what they say with a grain of salt. Although they are more educated than doctors on the causes and treatments, etc. (docs think there's no known cause and no known cure, and the only treatment is low salt intake and bedrest, which is WRONG) they still hold to the party line that the only cure is delivery of the baby. According to Dr. Brewer's research and experience, with proper diet the risk of pre-eclampsia is virtually non-existent. He did his research in an area of California with low incomes, poor nutrition, and very high ratios of pre-eclampsia in pregnancies. The woman he worked with lowered their risk from 25-30% down to .5%.

His research made a lot of sense to me, and I plan to follow his diet in an effort to avoid developing PE again. I've added his website, www.blueribbonbaby.org, to my links section.

I also added a link to a great site, www.spinningbabies.com. This is GREAT info on things to do to get your baby in the right position for birth. Having a baby in the wrong position greatly adds to the risk of your having a c-section, since doctors are so quick to pronounce that the baby is too big, your pelvis is too small, etc. and just want to cut you open. Less time, less hassle, more money for them. Less risk for them too (in their eyes) because they don't have to worry about possible cord prolapse and other rare emergencies that would cause parents to want to sue. Of course, there's more risk to you, especially down the line, but during a hospital birth, who cares about you?

The spinningbabies website is down at the moment, but hopefully will be up soon. They seem to be having some technical difficulties. Keep checking back, it's worth it. They teach many exercises and techniques for turning baby (that don't involve anyone pushing on your stomach) including using a birthing ball, a rebozo sling, and many other techniques. I highly recommend it.

The Search for a Midwife

Journey to Homemaker

The search is on...and I'm getting tired of searching! I have decided to have a VBAC at home, after having three prior cesarean sections...thirteen months apart each time. Oh yeah, and my babies are huge. Wonder why I'm still searching?

Most midwives who are licenced or certified are a little hesitant. Particularly in my state, since there aren't many licensed midwives yet. They're worried if anything goes wrong it will hurt the midwife community in our state. Hello people, haven't you read the research? It would be more dangerous for me to continue having c-sections than to have VBACs. The rates of uterine rupture during a VBAC for mothers who are NOT given induction/augmentation drugs is about the same as the risk of having a prolapsed cord or a placental abruption for any mother...about 1% or so. The greatest cause of uterine rupture is not a prior c-section, but the mother receiving those drugs, whether she is a prior c/s or not.

Anyway, I'm going to have to go with a non-certified, or a non-licensed midwife. That's okay by me, a license from the state does not guarantee a good midwife. Some midwives just don't want the hassle from Uncle Sam, or the limitations the government imposes. One midwife I've contacted has 19 years experience, and has done home VBACs, including one for a woman with more c/s than me. The other one doesn't have nearly as much experience, but seems really knowledgable and definitely has strict standards she uses to choose who she will work with. She agrees it would be safer for me in the long run to start having VBACs. The risks to the mother go up with each c/s she has. They're not as bad as the doctors often say (mine has tried to guilt-trip me into a tubal ligation--NOT happening). Of course they don't tell you about these risks with the first two c/s, only when they realize you are serious about having a large family. What is it about these doctors being against large families? Haven't they ever heard of repeat business??

I have found a doula already. I'm really happy with her, she's very nice, I like her personality, and I really feel like we are "on the same page" about many things. She's not certified with DONA (Doulas of North America) yet, but she's done all the book work and workshops, and has attended the birth of several friends already. She's considered a volunteer doula, because she's not charging for her work, she just asks the mother to fill out papers to help her get certified. I'm happy to do that in exchange for the free care, especially since I think she's going to be great. She's also going to do postpartum doula work for me as well, coming to the house after the birth for two hours a couple of times a week, for several weeks. I'm really thrilled about that, since I will have four small children at that point. That will be free as well. She'll hold the baby if I want, watch the kids, do a load of laundry or dishes, tidy up around the house, talk to me, etc. Just having someone there to talk to will be great. I'm also going to talk to another doula about being a back-up in case anything happens with the doula I chose.

Now all I have to do is talk to the last midwife, make a decision, sew a baby sling and other stuff, get all the baby clothes out of boxes and wash them, unpack all the boxes left from moving in, clean the house, find a chiropractor, start doing the spinning babies exercises to get the baby in the right position for birth, buy or sew cloth diapers, find a birthing tub to rent...the list goes on!!

My first birth was a nightmare, ending in a c/s of course. I'll have to tell my birth stories another time, but it was bad, let me tell you. So I hope for this birth to be easier, more peaceful, less stressful, and an overall positive experience. I really think having a midwife is just what I need, plus the birthing tub will be great.

So I'd love people to pray that I have a safe and healthy birth...and quick and not-too-painful would be nice too! ;-)

Housework and Homebirth

Journey to Homemaker

Okay, I have to admit it. I'm slacking off again. Not keeping up with the house, etc. I spent several days doing massive amounts of laundry, and even getting it folded...but then it sat stacked in the living room for a week. I have almost all of it put away now, and have done a couple more loads, which need to be folded.

Our computer room, which is right off the garage, has been piled with boxes. I put most of those away, but then we brought more from our storage unit, and the room's a disaster. *sigh* And the floor in the dining area off the kitchen...well, we just won't talk about that!

I'm trying to unpack all the baby stuff and wash it before the baby is born. I have nine weeks left, but it might take me that long, lol. I think I need to re-read Fascinating Womanhood for more motivation. I've started making a study guide based on her end-of-chapter summaries and assignments, to keep in my household management binder. That way it will be easy to review the FW principles on a daily basis, without investing the time each day to read.

Recently, I have decided to try again for a homebirth. My first birth I planned on a homebirth, but couldn't afford a midwife so I decided to do it myself. But I had horrendous back labor, got scared, and went to the hospital. It was all downhill from there. I ended up with a completely unnecessary c-section, then another one 13 months later, and another 13 months after that. I had looked into a midwife with my last child, but couldn't find one who would do a VBAC at home for me because my births were so close.

I'd pretty much given up hope of a "normal" birth. But I decided to try one more time. I've found three midwives willing to take me in this area. I am really praying it works out, because I feel really "messed up" after all my cesareans. It was so draining emotionally and mentally. I feel that it contributed to my low milk supply, depression, and lack of bonding feeling with my children. I have a lot of anxiety abou the pain, and a lack of confidence in my ability to give birth. I feel "broken".

I think that having a VBAC will really help a lot. Then I finally won't feel like I missed the experience of giving birth. I've done a lot of research, and having a home VBAC is a lot safer than continuing to have even more c-sections. For previous c-section mothers who are NOT given induction/augmentation drugs to induce or speed up labor, the risk of uterine rupture is only .8-.9%, less than the risk of many other birth complications that any mother could have, such as a cord prolapse. THowever, the risk of developing other dangerous complications like placenta accreta or placenta previa (or much worse, both conditions together) increases astronomically with each new cesarean a mother has.

I could really use some prayers that I am able to have a wonderful, safe homebirth experience, and a healthy and content baby. I hope to have a waterbirth, which I think will contribute to a less painful, more relaxed delivery for both me and my baby girl.